Holy Frustration
Posted by Chilly | Posted in Bible Study, Christian Life, Me Stuff | Posted on 19-11-2009
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These two words are a pretty good description of what’s going on in my life right now…
You may be asking – how can holiness and frustration live side-by-side? Yeah, I’ve asked that too… I guess we have to figure out IF frustration is a sin? I hope it’s not – because IF it is – then I sin a lot! The dictionary defines frustration as: a feeling of dissatisfaction, often accompanied by anxiety or depression, resulting from unfulfilled needs or unresolved problems. Hmmm, so it’s a ‘feeling’… yeah, I feel that! Ha! As I read further into the definition I’m confronted w/ the question – am I dealing with some ‘unfulfilled needs or unresolved problems’? Yep, big time! So, how can I keep this from becoming sin? Well, I think it’s refusing to allow it to take the next step ‘accompanied by anxiety or depression’ - no thanks, that would suck!
I see lots of frustration in God’s servants. No one was more vulnerable and honest about it than David – check out these words (which I’ve felt personally lately)…
O Lord, how long will you forget me? Forever? How long will you look the other way? 2 How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul, with sorrow in my heart every day? How long will my enemy have the upper hand? 3 Turn and answer me, O Lord my God! Restore the sparkle to my eyes, or I will die. Psalm 13:1-3.
How long?! Yeah, these words resonate in me a lot right now! Can you hear the frustration in David’s inquiry? I’ve been asking God lots of ‘how long‘ questions:
- How long before we get a building or venue in Midtown Detroit?
- How long before something changes with our current housing situation?
- How long before people really catch the vision?
- How long until sin is overcome in some key people’s lives?
- How long will Detroit continue to suffer financially, morally & spiritually?
- How long will compromise win over character?
- How long until we’re out of debt?
- How long until maturity kicks in for some leadership?
- How long will Christians remain cowards?
- How long? How long? How long??
I feel closer to God than ever before – I really do! And, things in my life (health, marriage, family, studies, passion & determination) have never been stronger. But, wow, this holding pattern is messin’ with me. I pray that it’s growing character – prayer & patience usually do that – but, I’m still dealing w/ daily ‘Holy Frustration’…
The key for me is NOT dwelling on my feelings but turning them into faith. No anxiety, No depression – NO THANKS! Faith makes me fight – feelings make me flounder… I choose to fight! I think a key to dealing with frustration is being sure that we finish our conversations with God! Look how David ends his chat w/ the Lord:
But I trust in your unfailing love. I will rejoice because you have rescued me. 6 I will sing to the Lord because He is good to me. Psalm 13:5-6
Yeah, at the end of the day (or even the dialog), I’m reminded – once again – that His love won’t fail and He is SO good to me!
I’ve still got a lot of unanswered questions that require me to pray hard, workout longer, stay up later, study deeper and trust bigger … these things are also accompanied by deep sighs, foot tapping, long walks at random times and even an occasional tear. But, I KNOW He has a plan – it will be right on time – and He can handle my Holy Frustration.
Can anyone else relate to this blog??
… I’m going for a walk (again) … Chilly
thanks so much for being so transparent and vulnerable. i really appreciate someone being honest with me and not pretending to live in a world where we have all the answers and life is easy. thanks so much.
yesterday i printed out my application for xmin next year! getting pumped!
I don’t know about frustration per se. BUT I definitely feel that “how long” business for me.
I know i have been here only two weeks, but definitely I am ambitious in just getting involved quickly with this church.
Been trying to grab coffee/shoot emails/text the key people at the church trying to see how and what I can do to help. But so far nothing has materialized.
So feeling this right now…thank you.
I hear ya man..that’s the cry of my heart! Thank you for the reminder that God’s shoulders are big enough to handle my holy frustration as well as the reminder to finish the conversation!
I know God’s timing’s perfect ..even when it doesn’t seem so to me!
My pastor calls it divine anger. It can motivate you to doing great things for God.
WOW! THATS IT! Now I can put a label on what I’ve been feeling!!!!! I just stood up at my desk while reading this!
Nailed it Bro! It’s like God had you write this just for me! (and others, I’m sure!)
How long till my family doesn’t have to suffer financially?
How long till we can afford to do the all of the things that we’ve been called to do in the place of ministry God has us?
You’ve been walking, I’ve been pacing!
Hey Son, You know me and my past frustrations in difficult situations. Of course I felt what you are feeling, even now I am living with a set of why’s? where’s? and how’s? I’ve been mad at people, mad at leadership and my covering and even at times mad at God. But living beyond the frustration and then looking back I see His hand and His direction. Then I laughed and just ask Him to help me forgive those I blamed and trust Him more for the future.
Well I can’t say my frustration is holy but I do know it’s real. Things like what am I’m supposed to do and how am I going to do it are always on my mind. But that’s where trust comes in for me. Some times what else can we do? Praying for you all.
Nate-
I can certainly relate but I don’t think I grasp the magnitude of the frustration you’re feeling right now. You’ve said before, “faith is trusting in God’s long list of accomplishments.” As I’m frustrated with some things now I’m reminded of the amazing ways the Lord has already come through. And I’m not even thinking back very far! This week has been a victory heaped up on top of a year of triumph in Jesus’ name. There’s more to come, and this frustration teaches me to go to Him earlier and continuously.
I’m praying for you and know this is going to turn out. Thanks for believing Jesus and obeying for the sake of our city and His great name!
Chilly,
I walked through a time of “holy frustration” several months ago. It’s hard (understatement of the decade!). The hardest part for me was wanting to do something… anything… to get moving. Yet, I kept feeling the check of the Holy Spirit saying, “Not yet.”
I’m so glad I waited, because God opened THE perfect door at THE perfect moment.
Through this I learned the profound truth in Romans 5 — “but we also rejoice in our [holy frustration], because we know that [holy frustration] produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.” Without the holy frustration, I would have never learned what I learned, nor ended up where I ended up.
I’m standing with you in prayer that you will grow in perseverance, character and hope as you wait for the Holy Spirit to say, “Go! Now’s the time!”
( tears)…Beautiful… is the only word I could think of to define this post. Thank you! I relate and I am super encouraged. Thank you again!!!
“I think a key to dealing with frustration is being sure that we finish our conversations with God!”. This is what keeps us focusing outward and not inward. When I focus inward I let the feelings get to me. Focusing outward requires faith and trust.
Thanks!
Hi Chilly,
I can totally relate to your blog and to your questions! I have been there, and then I have been there again with new “how longs”as well as some of the same “how longs”. But you are so right about finishing our conversation with God!! He is faithful and He has been and is sooooo good to me and to you and to each one of us serving Him! I will keep you and your family in prayer because if anyone has gone through the “how longs” and can totally relate to those questions and longings it’s me and my family! Love ya’ll!!
I definitely understand this feeling. We are personally in a holding pattern, too, trying to bloom where we’re planted and serve Him in the waiting. When I am in right thinking I realize that I am to cast all my cares on Him, and have faith and thankfulness that He IS giving me everything I need, everything He wants me to have in his timing, and rest in Him, I don’t really have any unfulfilled needs or unresolved problems. It’s just getting past those “feelings” and letting the Holy Spirit remind me of His truth. Remembering to thank Him for everything helps. Everything – it ALL – the waiting, the delays, the injuries and sickness – are working for our good!
How Long? I have many “how long” questions of my own. I will continue to wait for the “how longs’ to be answered, until then, I will be resolute in the call to holiness.
“Can anyone else relate to this blog??”
YES!!!! (nuff said)
Praying with you and for you! and thanking Jesus that He’s braught me here and that He’s not done!!!